This is now

I said the words to him today. "That was then."

We were joking around about me hanging out naked in my apartment, and he said it wasn't anything he'd never seen before, and I said, "Well, that was then." And he got this kind of look that I couldn't read and said, "That was then."

I think I may have, without meaning to, laid the definition for our new relationship. That was then, and now we don't do naked. The thing is, obviously that's not what I want. I'd love to keep doing the naked thing. It's the friend thing that I can't handle.

Why not, "That was then, and now the naked thing is in an entirely different context"? But that's not likely to happen for a couple of reasons. One is that I've got thirty and a half hours to tell him I love him, and I just don't see myself sprouting that kind of stones in that short time. The other is that if Hot Mess has, in fact, been giving off signals that he has more than friendly feelings for me, and a real possibility does exist, I've slammed the door on that nice and good.

"That was then." What possessed me to say that? Pathetic.